LAUGH
Being a teacher is a hard job. And there are many events that just make it even more difficult for us! We think the following should be outlawed in schools.
1. Icebreakers
Why? Because they serve no real purpose and we hate them! That should be reason enough.
2. School the day after open house
This is like scheduling track and field practice after running a marathon. We have parents and kids, together, sucking the very life out of us. We need a day of rest after open house.
3. Excessive use of buzz words at staff meetings
These buzz words annoy us. If this is the “new normal,” I am desperately seeking the DeLorean from Back to the Future. These are words we want to go away, not hear reiterated at every meeting.
4. Sending in Rose Art crayons for supplies
Don’t get me wrong, we are thankful for any contributions to our classroom, but these end up in the trash really quickly. Every child has to press so hard to get any color that Every. Single. Crayon breaks in two from the pressure. And, the kids cry.
5. Splitting up kids when a sub doesn’t show up
Classes already splitting apart at the seams? Throw in ten more students without desks or copied work. Teachers can handle it. They have superpowers, you know?
6. Being called to the principal’s office without being given a reason
A million thoughts go through our minds when we’re called to the principal’s office. Did she see me tiptoe in late this morning? Did I leave a kid out at recess? Did I get caught for not having my lesson plans done? Just Tell Us In The Frickin Email!!
7. Fire drills during testing
Let’s put the two single most stressful things together. That will work. This should definitely be outlawed in schools.
8. Friday the 13th and a full moon in the same week
This is the week when the dull hum in your classroom becomes a mighty roar. Glue sticks are used as Chap Stick, walls are licked, and students do actually “Bark at the Moon.” Trust me, I teach kindergarten. I know.
9. Spirit days
Kids literally bounce off the walls when anything is not normal at school. So, when there are a million different color mohawks and Cindy Lou Who hairstyles everywhere on Crazy Hair Day, we are going to have a Crazy Teaching Day. It’s a given.
10. Staff meetings with no doughnuts and coffee
We will endure a lot if there is food available. If not, please cancel and send an email. Meetings that could have been an email without even courtesy donuts should be outlawed in schools immediately.
11. Leaving the copy machine jammed
We arrive to the copier excited that there is no line only to find that it makes the most awful screeching noise as there is a paper stuck in there from the teacher before us.
12. Turning in lesson plans on a Friday
Actually, turning lesson plans in on any day is a crime. Let us plan how we want.
13. Observations during a pandemic
We are already stressed about our technology cooperating. We don’t need the added stress of being evaluated on top of all of the chaos this school year has brought.
14. PD on a weekend
Being “voluntold” we need to attend the latest and greatest PD session on a teaching strategy that was popular in the ’70s is just wrong. We work so much overtime during the week. At least, give us our weekends free.
15. Halloween on a Sunday
Or, actually any day that is not Friday or Saturday. Sugar comas are real, people.
16. “No jeans” policies
And leggings bans, too. Does admin forget what working with kids is actually like? We need to be comfortable. Dressing up might be suitable for your position, but we get down and dirty. We need to dress accordingly.
17. Using a staff work day for PD
Before the first day of school, we have staff work days. These should NOT be PD Days. This will add stress at a time when we are already stressed to the max. Let us get our rooms ready. Do you know how long that takes?
18. Hybrid learning
Students at home needing attention and students in person needing attention don’t mix. Our heads explode.
With all the crimes being committed in education, I think teachers deserve restitution in the way of better pay. Our salariesare the biggest crime of all.
What do you think should be outlawed in schools? Let’s chat in the #teacherlife community!
